Phantom Hair

No, I did not grow my hair out to look like Gerard Butler...

But I did, however, cut my hair! It was getting really annoying. It kept touching my ear and tickling it and being... well... annoying!

Does anyone know what a phantom limb is? Well, I learned about it while I was getting my CNA. It is defined as: The perception of sensations, usually including pain, in an arm or leg after the limb as been amputated. The brain still gets messages from the nerves that originally carried impulses from the missing limb. Phantom limb syndrome is relatively common in amputees, especially in the early months and years after limb loss.

So, after chopping my annoying hair off, I still get the annoying feeling of it brushing my ear and tickling my ear. So chopping it off did nothing. It's just even more annoying that I can't brush my hair away from my ear!

Anyone else ever experience phantom hair?

Random Openings

So, as I write my talk, I have been trying to figure out how to start it. I'm probably going to just start right into it. I know that "mandatory jokes" annoy some people but I couldn't help but think of a few. So I've had many things go through my head and here are my two favorites that I'm still not going to use but I thought you might enjoy them.

#1

I’ve always been grateful of going to Church at the Stake Center. We have a great multi purpose room that we can use for activities, lots of rooms to split up how ever we needed, and it's been great. But now looking out at you, I realize: a bigger meeting house means a larger chapel. A larger chapel means you can pack more people in to listen to you give a talk that is 140% larger than any talk you’ve given before due to the fact that you were just promoted from “youth speaker” to regular “speaker,” which, by the way, does not come with a larger wage or more benefits, it’s just a better title and more hours. But regardless of this brothers and sisters I am excited to speak to you because that means I am that much closer to leaving on my mission.

#2

Well, right now my nervous system is making it very apparent that it is alive and kicking. In fact, I'm just grateful that I'm not frozen in fear. When frightened you're brainstem takes over and you have a "fight or flight" response. So right now I'm just fighting my brain to not punch the microphone or bolt out the door.

I know, they're kinda lame, but hey! What are ya going to do?

My Favorite Things

Recently Centerville has been receiving moisture. It's been pretty awesome! Now for those of you who didn't know already (which apparently is way more than I thought. I thought you all knew and I come to find that my own mother didn't know!) I L.O.V.E. the rain! I don't know how to express my love for it. It's awesome!

Anyway, I also love books as I'm sure you know! At least I really hope you do... Seriously... I can sort of understand the rain thing, but books? They are such a part of my life!

And this love you must know. You have to know it! If you don't, then you don't know me at all. I know it's harsh, but it's true. But I'm positive you know this I mean come on it's me! Anyway I guess I should reveal it so you're aren't worrying if I should shun you forever. It's music. Easy, right?

Anyway the reason why I talk about those things is that recently I have been able to combine these things and provide wonderful afternoons for myself. With Centerville's recent rainfalls I have had the opportunity to grab my current read, my ipod, and myself and head to a park (I've gone to Smoot, Founders, and Island View), sit myself under a good tree (but would usually have to move to a firmer shelter, such as the bowery), plug in my ipod and read. Man I love that feeling! It's awesome. The only thing I wish more is that I could be out in the rain, but that would ruin the book...

I wish there was some kind of invention to make it possible for me to be in the rain and nothing happen to my book, that would be perfect, but I can't think of anything that can happen without magic, haha.

I also love showers probably because it's so like rain... But the ipod and book would be destroyed in such conditions... *sigh*

If you have any genius ideas of how to keep my book from ruin, I would love to hear them!

Warning!

So, I recently read that that institutions are being erected all over the U.S. where you can go for torture. These places aren't new either! They first appeared in ancient Greece but disappeared until the 19th century. In modern times you have to get a membership just to enter! But this deters very few. I haven't found any stats saying how many people have these memberships but I would guess it's at least in the tens of millions.

Now, I have a question: How, how did America allow these institutions to become so popular? How was it not stopped before now? Well, I read a study that says that it's good for you! Ha! Can you believe it? Torture, good for you! I recently read a study that says these places are especially popular January through March! There is a torture season! What is the deal, people?! Well I must admit I have gone to one of these places... actually multiple times... But I've never felt better afterward! And yes I have a membership for express torture.

Oh, and guess what? You have to torture yourself! Yes, you pay to get in to the place and they give you all the tools necessary to torture yourself. Isn't that sadistic? Seriously! How have these places become so popular?!

Well my visits are soon to be over because once I'm on my mission, I don't believe missionaries are allowed to visit the gym.